As much as I would love Mary-Kate Olsen to put away the flannel, I’m not sure if I can actually envision that happening. Check out her clan’s ensembles spotted on the streets of New York and you’ll see why. . . her group loves the tartan!  After a particularly rough patch involving investigations into Heath Ledger’s death, she’s probably feeling a little more stress-free now.

Judging from her usual not-so-happy-looking self, we’re pleased to see her out on a Saturday looking happy, toting a coffee, and smiling. Small victories.

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Pictures by Jason Lee / Splash News

Mary-Kate’s lawyer took to the press yesterday after a story ran in the New York Post claiming Mary-Kate Olsen is seeking immunity from prosecution before speaking to the DEA about Heath Ledger’s accidental overdose. The AP reports:

“We have provided the government with relevant information including facts in the chronology of events surrounding Mr. Ledger’s death,” Miller said in a statement Monday, “and the fact that Ms. Olsen does not know the source of the drugs Mr. Ledger consumed.”

The Associated Press has spoken to an official within the DEA who can confirm the reports that Mary-Kate’s lawyer is indeed angling for immunity and refusing to cooperate:

The official confirmed a report that Olsen wants a promise of immunity from prosecution before speaking to the Drug Enforcement Administration. Olsen was a close friend of Ledger’s, and was the first person called by a masseuse who found the 28-year-old “Dark Knight” actor’s lifeless body in his Manhattan apartment.
Authorities have obtained a subpoena that could force Olsen to appear before a grand jury if negotiations with her lawyer fail, the official said.

Okay, let’s cut to the chase: So, maybe Mary-Kate Olsen provided Heath Ledger with the drugs and left a note saying “Take 20 and call me in the morning.” That doesn’t mean she necessarily “killed” him, I think - maybe. Who knows? I’m not very good at this lawyer stuff. But, I do know a half vampire bat when I see one, and how do you convict a member of the animal kingdom? Answer: You don’t. That’s double jeopardy, my friends. I rest my case and object stuff.

Mary-Kate Olsen is refusing to be interviewed by federal investigators about Heath Ledger’s accidental overdose until she’s granted immunity from prosecution. This latest move proves what I’ve always feared: Pauly Shore knew something relevant when he claimed the Olsen twins are diabolical. May God have mercy on us all. The New York Post reports:

The actress’ lawyer has repeatedly rebuffed attempts by the feds to question Olsen, who was the first person called after her masseuse discovered Ledger’s body in his SoHo apartment in January.
Frustrated federal officials could obtain a grand-jury subpoena to compel the funky “Full House” actress to tell them whatever she knows about the “Dark Knight” star’s behavior, his possible drug use and the events of that fateful morning, according to sources.
Probers have interviewed everyone connected to Ledger and his death, including his doctors, the masseuse, bodyguards, housekeepers, business associates and even the mother of his 2-year-old daughter, Matilda, his “Brokeback Mountain” co-star Michelle Williams.
“Ms. Williams was extremely nice and cooperative,” a source said.

And by nice and cooperative, the source meant Michelle Williams grabbed an FBI agent by the collar and yelled “It was Mary-Kate Olsen, you sonofabitch! I’ll have your badge for breakfast.” But no one ever suspects the Olsen twins - until it’s too late. I’m serious. They’re still looking for Bob Saget’s body.

EDIT: Turns out Bob Saget is still alive. I’m as shocked as you are.

Thanks to Liz who won’t watch Full House without the lights on and a priest handy.

Paris Hilton thought up a TV show that will undoubtedly make me pay random strangers to throw an axe at my face. It’s basically The View but hosted by famous celebrities who will address such topics as the paparazzi, career management and, most importantly, girl talk! At last, a show that tackles battling herpes while finding the perfect purse. Never stop dreaming, folks. The Chicago Sun Times reports:

Just imagine Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, Tori Spelling — as well as [Denise] Richards, Hilton and her former ”The Simple Life” co-star, Nicole Richie — together in one big two-hour special sharing ”their side” of what it’s like to be them.
That concept alone reportedly has intrigued a couple of cable channels initially contacted about the concept: Bravo and Lifetime.

In the future, historians wearing jet packs will point to this show’s inception as the apex of civilization’s decline. But then they’ll find themselves addicted to the catty chatter ultimately dooming their own space-age utopia. Don’t believe me? Just spend a good 30 seconds imagining Britney Spears’ commentary on, shit, anything. If within the first 10 you don’t shove your face in the oven, congratulations, you’re a robot. Now fix me a drink, tinny!

Mary-Kate Olsen stopped by Letterman last night to promote her new film The Wackness where she talked about spending her 22nd birthday at Bonnaroo, making out with Ben Kinglsey and not wanting her kids to be child actors. She then brought up going to high school with Spencer Pratt who Dave mentioned is a little “wormy.” I guess that’s showbiz talk for “epic assclown.” Good to know:

Mary-Kate: He does not have a good temper. He walked out of a few games. He would walk off the field. He was like, ‘Me or the coach!’
Dave: Were you friends with the guy at the time?
Mary-Kate: No.
Dave: Because I’m surprised about the soccer. Because looking at the guy, he looks like a guy that has never broken a sweat, I would guess.
Mary-Kate: Oh, my God — that brings up stories! I don’t know if I should talk about it.
Dave: No, c’mon, let’s hear one. Let’s go.
Mary-Kate: [laughs] The Wackness is a great film.
Dave: What I don’t understand is how does a kid that age, and he’s only in his 20s or maybe even your age, how does a kid like that get to be so oily?
Mary-Kate: It’s a mystery to me.

While I’m not surprised that Spencer Pratt is universally looked upon as Hollywood’s shit stain, I’m extremely amazed at how normal Mary-Kate Olsen appears. For once she doesn’t look like Yoda on heroin and is actually speaking to other humans. I always figured Mary-Kate communicated via an intricate series of wrist flaps and lip pouting. But real words? Honestly, who saw that coming?

Video after the jump.