Pete Wentz called into Ryan Seacrest this morning to talk about what it was like seeing the birth of little doomed-for-life Bronx Mowgli. Us Magazine reports:

“Right before she went into labor, I was like, ‘Oh my God, I think I’m having a heart attack!’ Natural things start going on in your body,” Wentz went on. “My heart started beating really fast.”
He explained, “You see your wife in all this pain, and you really don’t know what’s happening.”
But Ashlee “took care of me and made sure I was OK and then we went into labor,” Wentz told Seacrest. “That’s why she’s a saint.

Pete, just FYI, that strange thing you saw is called a “vagina,” and somebody put a baby in Ashlee’s. Now, I don’t know who did it, but if you hop in the back of the Mystery Machine with Shaggy and Scoobs here, I’m pretty sure we can all figure out it was Joe Simpson. Let’s roll!

Ashlee Simpson-Wentz gave birth to a baby boy last night and simultaneously won the “You’ve Got to Be Shitting Me” Award for the most ridiculous baby name. People reports:

Bronx Mowgli Wentz weighed 7 lbs., 11 oz., and was 20 1/2 inches long.
“Ashlee, Pete and baby Bronx are all healthy and happy, and thank everyone for their well wishes!” a spokesperson tells PEOPLE.

Bronx Mowgli Wentz. So I’m guessing Chewbacca Squishypants was already taken?

Congrats to Ashlee & Pete and best of luck to Bronx. You’re gonna need it.

Remember when Ashlee Simpson got pregnant, I’m guessing, at least ten years ago? That kid’s still in there. While taping an upcoming episode of The Ellen DeGeneres Show, Jessica Simpson says her little sister may have to induce labor soon. People reports:

“They’re going to have to. It’s already developing really quick,” Jessica said Monday at a taping of the The Ellen DeGeneres Show.
Ashlee – described by husband Pete Wentz more than two weeks ago as due at any moment – has already tried other ways to begin labor.
“Different foot massages and stuff,” Jessica told DeGeneres in the show airing Wednesday. “I don’t know. I think she’s really just jumping around trying everything right now.”

Then again, look who the source of this information is. The day I take medical advice from Jessica Simpson is the day I end up performing a C-Section with a hot dog because “babies like mustard.”

Holy mom-to-be!
Asslee Simpson’s bump seems to have gone from zero to sixty in a matter of days!
Pete Wentz’s wife showed off her growing belly (and cha chas) on a girls’ day out in L.A. on Wednesday.
Ass and a gal pal hit up the Coffee Bean and American Apparel in the Valley.
Big boobies look good on [...]

Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and hubby Pete Wentz are expecting a baby girl, according to Star magazine. An insider dished:

“Ashlee and Pete are on cloud nine. The doctor told them they actually conceived the baby just before Valentine’s Day while they were on vacation and has given them an initial due date of Oct. 31. When Pete heard he might have his baby on Halloween, he went nuts. For an emo-rocker type like Pete, that would be just too perfect!”

Star also claims that the excited daddy to be has even started sewing baby clothes. How cute!

Papa Joe Simpson is sure to be thrilled he’ll have another little girl to “manage” as soon as he can get her doing something that’ll bring in some cash.

Photo Source: WENN

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are having a girl. The due date is October 31, and Pete’s so stoked he’s actually sewing clothes for the kid, according to an insider for Star:

“When Pete heard he might have his baby on Halloween, he went nuts. For an emo-rocker type like Pete, that would be just too perfect!”
The daddy-to-be is so excited about his daughter’s arrival, he’s even taken up a new hobby — sewing baby clothes!

If I ever had a child, the last thing I’d do is sew it clothes. Unless, of course, you count a burlap sack. Who wants to go to the lake?

Ashlee Simpson ventured out in public last night and displayed her expanding mammaries. Somewhere Joe Simpson just tipped backwards in his chair yelling “Yippee!” That said, I’m glad to see Ashlee’s doing well. You know what I hear is awesome for prenatal development? Topless wrestling with your older sister. I’m pretty sure I read that in a book somewhere. Okay, maybe it was more like a couple of piece of papers I made a flipbook out of. Ooh, wait, shut up. This is the part where Batman shows up to referee. “Fight fair,” he says. BOOOOO! KILL THE REF! Preferably with a nipple!

photo courtesy of PR Photos/www.prphotos.com

Pete Wentz compared his Fall Out Boy band members to the cast of the 1939 classic movie: “The Wizard Of Oz“:

“The way it works is, Patrick (Stump, singer) is kind of like Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz, and we’re all the supporting characters. I’m like the Tin Man, (drummer, Andy) Hurley is Toto, and (guitarist, Joe) Trohman is definitely the Lion, because he’s got big hair and he’s very boisterous.”

Wow, you’ve got to be really full of yourself to compare your not so great band to the cast of one of the best movies ever!

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A solo Ashlee Simpson shows off her pregnancy curves as she leaves Ren-Mar Studios in Hollywood on Tueseday..
Mrs. Wentz attended a taping of her husband Pete new MTV show, FNMTV (read: effin’ MTV), which hopes to “save the music video”.
The new video show is hosted by Pete and premieres this Friday night, June 13 @ [...]